Sunday is my Birthday. Though I’ve had so many before, this one feels different. My childhood birthdays seemed to take forever to arrive but when they did, they were joyous! This special day was set apart just for me, decorations, the toy I’d been dreaming of, being sang to in celebration and a candlelit cake with a wish.
As a young adult, birthdays still had a cake, eaten with family before going out to celebrate with friends. Later, birthdays became handmade cards from my children, breakfast in bed and I baked the cake to celebrate with them.
The kids are grown now, far away and busy with their own lives. I’ll get a call or text, no cake with a wish, low carb diet be damned! But, my husband gave me the gift I’d hoped for, an amount of money to spend on myself.
It sounds funny I guess because he’d gladly go shopping and terrify me with his over the top gift giving. I’m simpler than he can fathom and so are the things that bring me joy. I don’t need furs, diamonds and trips to the spa.
I’m easy in a way he doesn’t understand. I love a journal, a special pen to write with, a trip to a bookstore or amazon gift certificate where I can buy a bargain book that I’ll read over and over again. I love bubble bath and lotions, a music box, an hour glass, or a kaleidoscope from a secondhand store. He granted me my wish without limit where I could spend all I wished and took me everywhere I asked to go.
I guess I’m not good at doing me or being a girl. I shopped the clearance and sale aisles which exasperated him. When I purchased curtains for our bedroom instead of buying something for myself at the first store, he threw a weighted blanket into the basket as well. I’d talked about them in the past so….
Day 2, returned weighted (outrageously priced) blanket. It’s not that I didn’t care for it but rather the rediculousness of not being able to wash the darn thing. Nope, hand wash only, no dryer, lay flat to dry. Can’t you just see me hand washing this 20lb blanket in the tub? You can’t wring it out so dragging the now sopping wet thing out of the tub like a dead body to lay it out….where? Where exactly am I to lay out sopped now 40lb blanket to dry? It explicitly says not to hang it! Returned said ridiculous blanket with Mr Pouty Face, purchased new bedding set instead.
Next up, he took me to Marshall’s HomeGoods where I infuriated him further by purchasing a $6 basket to keep the dogs toys in. Honestly, they’re like children, dragging their toys out all over the floor! Also, 2 sets of plain white dishes, one for $15 the other for $13. Mr Sour Puss swears, never again! He’s quite threatening concerning what I’d better get for myself on Amazon. Haha
My Sweet mother sent me a huge plant today. It must be 3ft tall! How blessed am I to still have my mother and my dad still with me. As lovely as the plant is (I have no idea what it is) I find it humorous. People send me plants as jokes. I can and have killed cactus! A mother never gives up hope, I guess.
I am known far and wide for my plant killing capabilities….except for tomatoes. It’s the weirdest thing! Normally if I walk past a plant it’ll lay over and play dead but I planted tomatoes on a lark with my mom during one of her visits. I never watered them nor even went near them again and the darn things would not stop growing! Of course I was on a no carb diet at the time so couldn’t eat them but hand to God, snow on the ground, covered in ice…tomatoes on the vine!
Speaking of my mother….I find birthday rituals to be a curiosity. I’m thinking that it’s all so backwards. Perhaps I should be sending my mother flowers and baking her a cake. I literally did nothing for this honor, in fact I think I slept through most of it while she did all the work! She can send me flowers on mothers day, I did actually make her a mom!
I’m not going to live forever. Each year now seems to end with the question of seeing another, each year closer to that certainty, each flying by. Tomorrows have never been certain, so why do I grow so aware or count the ticking moments? Perhaps, while it’s still day, we should sing the songs within our hearts, dance while we still can and eat another slice of cake.